Blooming Too Early (#1)

I used to get massive headaches after speaking at large events. I’ve spoken in front of crowds of thousands for various causes and each event ended the same: me cradling my head waiting for the pounding to stop.

That’s because I’m an introvert who can be extroverted when I need or desire to be. But introversion predominates in me. So, when I spent considerable time in the spotlight, I needed long periods of rest and solitude to feel like myself again.

But that wasn’t the main reason why I stopped taking major speaking gigs. The reason I stopped is because there’s such a thing as blooming too early. God gives us a metaphor in flowers and trees.

Blooming too early puts unnecessary stress on a tree. New growth can be shocked and damaged which can have long term negative consequences. Trees are on a schedule of their own that will have them bloom when the season is right for their thriving. But outside forces can interfere with the trees’ internal clock, making it sprout before it’s ready.

I felt like God was calling me to "bury" myself so that He could do the private and unseen work of nurturing me. Others were pushing me to sprout and bloom before it was quite right for me. I felt that if I continued to sprout because of outside forces, that I would be a bright but quickly fading star. The bloom would be fragrant, but it wouldn’t last for long. I would be stuck talking about a handful of things I was known for—and I’d be incentivized to do so. I don’t have any regrets about that time. It showed me what I am capable of, and for that I am so grateful.

When I quieted all the noise, I could hear God saying that if I was willing to be a seed, He would nurture and cultivate my potential. I came to see that I should use my gifts in a way that aligned with my personality and not in a way that put unnecessary stress on me. And that’s part of the reason why I began this newsletter—so that my blooming could be more aligned with where I feel I’m called to be.

My hope is that this message resonates with you or someone you know. Many of us experience times in our life in which we feel the world pulling us one way and that voice inside pulling us another. God’s plan for our lives is always better and more conducive to our thriving.